Decision – Done!!!

It’s been a while since I wrote because as I explained previously, us Larges don’t do decisions. One wise family member recently said that “This roller-coaster would be at home in Florida”

Even after we made our “official” decision we changed our mind. I can only apologise to those that we dragged along for the ride.

Reactions have been OK to our news. Our poor Brothers, one of whom made the roller coaster comment, who have been a part of every decision via WhatsApp. We’re such a close family!

So, let me give you a run down to our final decision.

Last Sunday we were going. All excited we messaged said brothers to inform them. One of whom simply received a gif of an aeroplane taking off by Dave. The man can’t help wind people up. My brother didn’t even see the message. Worked out well for us.

Monday evening: Our official decision day is nearing a close and we submitted the email declining the job. Instant sadness sweeps over the Larges. Hopefully we’ll be done now with this craziness. Should have known with us it wouldn’t be that simple.

Tuesday: I’ve got my grown child home for the day and the poor thing I don’t think could have ever envisaged the mix of emotions that would consume his day of rest.

I need to shop, it’s the only way I can get over this feeling of sadness that’s consuming me. Dave isn’t communicating (I know, I know he’s at work) I think I annoyed Kieran with the large Sighs I kept doing.

Little could he realise that his life would turn into all sorts of crazy in the Frozen aisle of Aldi. Dave has been emailed by his would be bosses and that’s it. We make our final final decision.

Don’t ever let us go on Who Wants to be a Millionaire. We need more than one final decision.

So, I’m assuming that as you’re still reading to this point, (what happens if you’re not and I’m talking to myself ? Oh well) you’re all interested in what was decided…..


The Larges are off! Again…

That’s right, we’ve decided to pack up again and move to Sicilia.

We’re so excited, although that sick feeling in the pit of stomachs keeps creeping in again. To be honest though it could be the full English I made Dave buy me earlier.

We hope you follow along as this time it really will be fun. The enormity of this decision is huge. And for much longer.

The work we need to do beforehand is too much to think of. I need a list.

Baxty is happy, especially as he had to go to the bathroom in snow. He found that he can poop on three legs. Quite talented really. Simon Cowell would be impressed.

Benji is pleased that he’ll be a VIP again because “I got treated like a VIP in school because I was British”. Last time he’ll be making that statement post Brexit!!!

Harry, he’s equally chuffed but sad he can’t take his wallpaper.

So, with that I will close.

More ramblings will follow now on a regular basis.

At present we don’t know when we’ll be off although I have found numerous houses I want and I’m worried they’ll go.

With that Ciao for now.


Addio Sicilia, arrivederci!

I’m writing this at 10am on the day we leave Sicily. It’s early I know to be writing but I felt I needed to.

You see for the last hour I have been attempting to pack the car. It dawned on me early that since my “rehearsal” Dave the Husband has inadvertantly shrunk the car when he last washed it. I have emailed him regarding this and await his apology.

If the car hasnt shrunk as I believe, then we are are officially the Clampits. Bar the chair on the roof for Grandma. It’s a kennel on the roof for the kids.

I haven’t even packed the football’s. And help me when the kids find out their Nerf guns may not make it. (I say may due to the fact that as I write this I may have thought of a gap they can go in.

Our car is full. So why on earth does our apartment still seem so also?

Anyway, moving on and to keep you informed. My big girl pants have, as feared, been separated from the other luggage. 3 cases arrived safely in Spencer’s Wood on Wednesday. Knickers decided from Milan they wanted to go back to Bergamo.

After speaking to the company currently responsible for my under garments and tweeting numerous sarcastic messages, my pants have made it to UK soil. They are sitting in Gatwick. Nanny seems lost of all hope and believes they will be returned. Dave is hopeful I will one day be reunited with my Apple gatherers.

Perhaps I should do a separate blog. Travels with undercrackers.

Baxty has now officially been issued his passport. He was also given tablets the size of Horses to swallow whole and a clean bill of health as well as various people feeling up his nether regions to check all is well. Dave feels that this should be a requisite of all passport applications. Anyway, I’m not sure Baxter will be grateful when he discovers how little room he now has to travel in. Oops.

We have no food in the house. This was a bit of a mistake on my part. We have two meals I need to cater for. As it stands, each will consist of literally bread and Jam with Pickled onions. We can also have Polish Grass Vodka, English tea and rice crispies. I don’t know why I worried. Or is that the Grass Vodka talking.

I have a feeling one meal will be McDonalds or at least some artery clogging tastyness. We’ve been told the cleaners are coming in to clean our apartment at 7.15. No room for us to be late!!!

Crap, football’s. They’re haunting me. And why has another laptop appeared?

The Husband has called. Mainly to remind me of my rehearsal and tell me what I already know. I think he’s trying to mock my inadequate measuring skills. If you ask me though perhaps he should be grateful. 😉😘

Is 11.04 too early for Vodka and Mountain Dew?

And did I mention my fear of boats, ships and all things that carry you across water?

The Mosquito dot to dot has faded some what. My arm is left feeling slightly numb. That could also be the vodka.

The Raptors are whining. Something to do with not having anything to play on. Maybe I should send them out to play with the puzzle that is squeezing two Nerf guns in a space the size of Tinkerbells butt crack.

Anyway, I need a nap. (Vodka related). The dog has vanished, the kids have disappeared down the crack of the bed since I last lifted it. I know they have air as I can hear Benji screech “This is all your fault”

What’s worse is on investigating said children to ensure their fighting is only minimal, they’re in their pyjamas. I’ve only gone and packed all their ruddy clothes. Give me strength.

I best go now so Ciao for now my peeps. You can guarantee that I will check in tomorrow and let you know which child I forgot. On the plus side they have 1 outfit to keep them going and pickled onions.


11 days and counting

It’s always hard to try to remember what we’ve done since I last wrote, how to try and make it entertaining and remember what it is I wanted to write again. If I’m perfectly honest I can’t remember when I even did a post. I’m lucky I remembered what I was doing as I walked from room to room.

I’m just going to have to pause here. The man of the room has just walked in, announced he’s so itchy and is expecting attention. When asked what he needs I got a simple reply – “I don’t know what I want”. I tell you, Derren Brown is onto a winner when it comes to relationships. I wish the feck I could mind read. Anyway, my beloved is now smelling something akin to a bottle of vodka after dosing himself up with Bug spray.

I should say it was a Mosquito invasion that had befallen him and not any other questionable reason.

He’s off to get Petrol now and put the trash out. It’s going to be a rough night in the Large household. Poor fellow. Oh it’s ‘ot’ as well. translated into English. “It’s hot”

Anyway, lets just say, right now, apparently it isn’t coming home. Poor England failed to ward of Croatia. Still, couldn’t have Tottenham saying 2018 they were the last winners of the world cup. WHUFC fans, you’ll know why this wouldn’t’ be a good thing.

Oh yeah, Sicily. To give an update, we’re 11 days away from leaving this beautiful Island.

Our suitcases are being collected Friday I am told and heading back to the UK. The company have informed me that we’re in a remote location and not only will it cost 28Eur extra but it could cause a delay in picking them up. I’m fully expecting to never see the vast majority of my big knicker collection ever again.

We still haven’t sold the wet suits that were bought for ornamental purposes either. We did have one offer but I’m not sure we should be paying someone to take them. I was only mildly insulted. What’s worse is I think the blighters have multiplied while in storage. I can’t remember him buying this many but I keep finding them.

This weekend was spent catching up with wonderful friends.

Firstly swimming on Saturday afternoon to say goodbye to wonderful person number 1 and his daughter. Saturday evening at a BBQ with Wonderful person number 2, a lovely lady, (my calming friend), her family and friends. Relaxed isn’t the word. It was so welcoming and warm.

Then Sunday, after a purely coincidental meeting, we got to spend Sunday with an awesome couple who we’d even said goodbye to the previous week, I can’t keep saying goodbye people. My hormones are never in a very strong place as it is. Anyway, we spent the afternoon at the beach chatting away swimming in beautiful clear water that was 1 degree warmer than ice and the evening in a fabulous restaurant that met Benji’s Strict Cheesy pasta criteria to perfection. (Thanks Isabella for arranging)

Needless to say, today this pair of 40+ year olds could have done with a nap. If only work, moving and children didn’t have to take priority. I’ve had a nice cup of tea now to keep me going another couple of hours.  Although I appear to be melting.

I like warm, I can deal with warm. But as my Mum can tell you, as a teenager I needed my coat with me at all times. I like to be prepared for all eventualities. This though is crazy. I weighed myself today though and seems I’m carrying a hippo somewhere in my big girl pants. I was convinced I must have melted some of it away but nope!!

At night though we have a different issue and thanks to Dave “I’m facking ‘ot love” Large its blooming freezing. He must have the A.C set to Arctic conditions with snow even falling in places. He’s not to happy when I turn the blasted thing off during the night to warm my nether regions back up slightly. Gees!!!

Anyway, it’s time to take my little raptors to bed. I mentioned it about 10 mins ago, had one tell me they were hungry. The other told me I’m mean and they’re still sat in the same place.

Ciao for now my peeps. Stay safe in the tropical conditions.